“Romeo, Romeo, Where art thou Romeo?”  If he is out there feel free to give him my number, address, and link him to my Facebook account because I have been searching for him.  My experiences with love have been barred by a view of false romantics.  From the “perfect” Hollywood three month relationships, to the Disney fairytales; I have been informed that every female whether or not she is on a quest to find her true love will.  Not only will a female find a man but he will be a man that will make her feel like royalty.  I have learned that I will one day meet a regal shield of a man that will save me from danger or harm.  Therefore, when I meet men, I search for the qualities of a media-like protector; a “real man.”  The Romeo, the Peter Parker, and Prince William’s…

The topic of love is one I try my best to avoid in conversations because most people don’t agree on one definition of love.  It’s quite controversial.  What exactly is love, anyway?  Well, I asked one friends for his definition of love.  He defined true love as finding the lost organ that your body needs to complete itself.  He said “it’s a feeling you get when you are passionate about someone or something.”  I immediately fell in love with his Shakespearean definition of love; dreamy eyed and all.  Webster’s Dictionary defines love as “a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties, attraction based on sexual desire, affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests (Webster).”  One of my favorite bible verses, 1st Corinthians 13:4-5 states “Love is patient and kind.  Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.  Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others.”  So why is it that I do not want to experience this from a guy and probably won’t for a while?

Reason number one, thank you Cinderella!  The storyline of Cinderella has inspired the way media presents true love for centuries.  Every female is subjected into believing that there is a Prince for her.  On April 29th I stayed up all night just to watch the royal wedding along with my homeboy Coby.  Of course, he fell asleep before the wedding even began but I stayed up until I saw the vows and the royal kiss.  I have no connection to the royal family.  I don’t even know the history of the family to be bluntly honest.  However, I stayed up and tuned into the wedding.  I loved the fashion, the glitz and glamour, but most of all, I watched it because it was another Cinderella story.  After watching the wedding my BBM status along with probably a million other females was “I want a Prince.”

So, I wrote a list of characteristics that defined my “perfect” Prince…

  • HOT
  • MUST HAVE SWAG
  • Strong Faith
  • Intelligent (College Educated or in school)
  • Works (Legally)
  • Family Man
  • Strong Desire for Success (and is working towards putting it into action)
  • Nice Car
  • Humble
  • Charming
  • Enjoys Traveling
  • Clean Record
  • Enjoys the arts
  • Desires to own a home/ property…
  • Understands the importance of communication
  • HONEST!

Then I realized…Kristen, this is why you are s-i-n-g-l-e!  I honestly have been searching for a guy around early 20’s with all of these traits.  Truth is, I probably will never meet a guy that has all of these traits.  (IF YOU ARE OUT THERE PLEASE REFER TO PARAGRAPH ONE IMMEDIATELY!)  In an age that I am supposed to be just dating, I have been searching for a “Mr. Big.”

I know I am not the only female out there with a “Prince List.”  Ladies, it’s time to let go of list and actually start dating.  I’m not saying it’s time to give any Joe a chance, but perhaps, we should go a little out of our realm.  What if that young man with no job is a medical student?  Or the brotha with no car right now is saving for an E-class?  I’m not a licensed relationship expert nor do I have ample amounts of experience.  However, as a strong communicator I can share my thoughts, opinions, and suggest a few skills that will empower women to make better choices in life…

Topic Tuesday’s 2:  Rid your minds of the Cinderella story and get REAL!

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